7+ years of my life in very graphic detail. Dating | sex | mental health | life blog. Frequently #NSFW 18+
I miss One Ball. There, I said it. I find myself tapping out text messages to him and then reminding myself that I’m still really angry at him and deleting whatever it was I just wrote. I am still angry, but I also think I might give him another chance. One last chance. At this stage, I’m not sure if he even deserves it (and I’m sure you’ll all have some stuff to say about it), but I miss him a lot. More than I thought I would. I really…
Read MoreMy worst nightmare has happened. Someone has come across my blog and knows that it’s me who writes it. That someone is One Ball, because of course he had to go and fuck things up … more so than he already has done. We’re at a crossroad here, people. This either means the end of this … or the end of us. Blog versus boyfriend. I told him that I was a dating/sex blogger, but I didn’t give him lots of information about it. Just the basics, skirting around the…
Read MoreSooooooo, after a bit of huffing and puffing, I finally made it on my naughty weekend away to see One Ball. It was a bit touch and go at first. I was up-and-down about the idea of going because I’ve been a bit emotional recently, especially with my period looming. Thankfully, I managed to keep it at bay for long enough to attempt my kinky weekend away. But that’s pretty much where the good shit ended. I tried to find a bikini wax EVERYWHERE. Nowhere had appointments. I was so…
Read MoreI’ve made plans to see One Ball this weekend, which means going on a journey that takes me two-to-three hours away from where I live. My plans include a whole load of nakedness, bucketloads of kinky fuckery, and that’s pretty much it. Snacks, a few drinks, but mostly kinky fuckery. However, I think Mother Nature might have other plans for me because she’s a real bitch. I think she’s going to make me get my period. FFS. I should’ve known it was coming soon, to be fair. I was an…
Read MoreIt would have been our three-year anniversary today. Mine and Big Love‘s anniversary, I mean. I’m hurting. A lot. Maybe I’m just being melodramatic? My heart hurts. Physically hurts. It feels heavy. It still feels like there’s a big part of my life missing even though he hasn’t been in it for some time now. Some days, I wake up and it all feels like it happened a thousand years ago. Other days, though? It feels like it all just happened yesterday. Like I’m still in the thick of grieving.…
Read MoreI’m fucked. Proper fucked. I have definitely fallen for One Ball. Do you want to know when I first realised it? I was at work and I missed his call, and that was the moment. I’d missed him. Because of his military job and what he was doing (training exercise), there were only brief periods of the day where we were both free to talk, and I missed his call. I tried to call him back, but by the time I finally got a moment free at work, and he…
Read MoreThis weekend has been a weird mixture of emotions. I went to see the new Twilight film with Bestie, had a mini moment of fear with One Ball, and reminisced about my former life with the Big Love Crazy stuff for a weekend, I tell ya. Crazy stuff. This time last year, I went to see the last Twilight film with my favorite gal pal on the other side of the world. Big Love and I were on one of the together phases of our together/not-together cycles, but he refused…
Read MoreI think I may be in trouble. I think I might care for One Ball more than I thought I did. Or my feelings have grown for him, I’m not sure. He’s gone back to where he normally works, a few hours drive from where I live, and he’s literally the only thing I can think about. He came to my work yesterday to say goodbye and it was almost too painful to bear. Okay, that might be a bit dramatic, but that’s how it felt. It suddenly felt very…
Read MoreLast night, right after I published my blog post, One Ball sent me a message. Just word one: “Hey.” I replied with the same one word, and then he asked how my evening was going, and then I bit the bullet and asked him if he would like to go out and get something to eat with me. I feel like I should give him a chance to explain himself before I kick him to the kerb, although I was still fairly certain that I was going to kick him…
Read MoreOne Ball met from me from work today, along with Bestie. We went for coffee, chatted, laughed, and joked. It was actually a pretty awesome evening. It made me very happy to see my best friend and my new boyfriend getting along so well. Until Bestie went home, that is, and One Ball gave me a ride back to mine. Then he dropped the newest bombshell in this saga that is meant to be our relationship. Let me just fill you in on some background stuff: he already lied to…
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