I Bought a Dress.

So guys and girls, I’ve bought this dress. The Bestie I’ve Never Had a Dalliance With and I are going to a party Saturday night. We are heading out to celebrate the engagement of two of our friends. It’s a pretty smart affair; Bestie has bought a new pair of shoes, trousers and a tie for the affair. I bought a new dress.

I need to talk about this dress. I don’t know why this dress has affected me quite so much but I’m pretty sure this is my “coming out” photo. This is it. This is that moment I’ve dreamt of my entire life. I will be stepping out for a night on the town in a size ten dress, feeling confident and looking FANTASTIC.

It’s a long dress; not quite ankle length. The whole back piece is a square of lace. There are two laces waved panels down the sides of the front of the dress. It has a thigh length slit down one side. It’s got the cutest and seriously flattering little cap sleeves too. It’s the perfect dress. It’s a dress literally built for my figure… in theory.

The thing with me is that I very often have fashion ideas in my head but when it comes to piecing them together, it never looks quite as I hoped because I was fat. There’s no hiding this. I’m not running away from it anymore. I was fat. Well, I watched the British version of “The Voice” and there was this incredible girl on it. The second she came onto the screen I was mesmerised. She had a mass of dirty blonde curly hair, bright red lips and beautiful big blue eyes. She was wearing a long red dress and beautiful red shoes. The dress had a thigh high split.

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wFhFVXwWumU]

She wasn’t a skinny girl. In fact, she was very curvy. I’d have said a curvy 12-14 (British). She rocked that shit better than anything I’ve ever seen before. Holy shit. If she could do it, I could do it. And that’s where I set to work.

I have been looking at the dress for a few months now. In fact, it’s been almost a year. I didn’t buy it because it didn’t go up to my size. Then when I found myself at a size 14, I put it off because I wouldn’t have anywhere to wear it. Then when I hit a size 12, I didn’t have the balls to wear it. Now I’m managing to fit my fat ass into size 10 jeans, I’ve bought that fucking dress. It’s a cleaner version of what the girl wore on “The Voice”. I already have the matching red shoes, rock eyeliner flicks and red lipstick better than anyone, and I’m sure I could create a mass of curly blonde hair.

I’m so excited for people to see me in this dress. Honestly, earlier on today I didn’t even want to go to the party. Now look at me. Eeeek! I’m so excited! I tried it on and it hugged me in all the right places. I actually look good. Scrap that… I look AMAZING!


I sent a photo of the dress to Jock. He’s go all silverback gorilla on me again – “All the boys are gonna be hitting on you”. I actually quite like it when he goes silverback from time to time. It’s kinda cute.

So yeah. I bought a dress.

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