The Very First One
Number: 1
Length: 10 months
If I had to describe this relationship in three words, I would say: dumb, dangerous, and daft.
Number 1: The Very First One
I met The Very First One like most people meet their first loves: at school. He was new there – a pad’s brat who had recently moved back to the country, and he caught my eye immediately. I didn’t think he felt the same.
That Time I Wasn’t Ready
Today, I’d like to talk about that time I wasn't ready... also known as my first ever blowjob. It was every bit the failure that first-time sexual experiences tend to be, and it was bred from hours of laughing, kissing, and heavy petting in that way you do with your first ever partner.He’d drawn the curtains and closed the door, just as we always did…
The First Time
The first time I had sex was a bloody nightmare… literally. If you’re on the squeamish side, you might want to skip this dating and sex blog post, because it literally involves injury to the dick. Don’t say I didn’t warn you!
The Second Time
The Very First One and I obviously tried to have sex again after our very bloody and disastrous first attempt. You’ll be happy to learn that the second time went considerably better than the first… but, well, we picked up some weird little habits that I had to unlearn in other relationships, going forwards.
That Time My Drink Was Spiked
It’s time for an uncomfortable story today, but the tale is only half as bad as it could have been. If there was ever a lesson to watch your drinks, including soft drinks, this tale is most definitely it… because my soft drink was spiked. Or I was drunk?I suppose it depends on who you ask. Why don’t I just start at the beginning and…
That Time I Got Nicked
And that’s the story of the time I got nicked… and my first ever breakup. Right in time for Number 2 to make an appearance. That breakup was easy, breezy, beautiful. I walked out of it feeling lighter and more emboldened, and I barely thought about him once we’d officially parted ways...