Dilemma
I genuinely meant to break up with Guy. I did. I promise you, I did. When I invited him over, I planned to sit him down, hand over the stuff that he’d left at my house, then tell him it was over. I almost did it, too. Almost being the important word. I think I’ve got myself a little dilemma, peeps.
He turned up, boyish grin on his face, ready for another night of fucking into the early hours. I immediately sat him down, sat beside him, then started talking. Best to get it out the way.
“I think we should talk about where this is going,” I started, but then he looked at me with his big, hopeful brown eyes and I stopped. Fuck.
“I love you,” he said.
Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.
Long story short, I didn’t break up with him. He stayed the night, then fucked me so hard I almost needed to use our safe word. I didn’t, but I almost needed to. I think that’s what gets us both off: figuring out my boundaries, maybe pushing them a little, seeing how far it takes for me to break. It’s fun. I’m enjoying it… which is why I’m struggling to dump him. Quite the dilemma, right?
He’s started to yank my hair a little harder, slap my ass with a little more force, and ram his cock into me with more gusto. We’re getting more adventurous with our sexual positions, too. We’ve moved from missionary position to having my legs thrown over his shoulders, offering him the very deepest of thrusts… and me just the right amount of pain. (He’s a proud member of the big [length] dick club.)
When he’s not pushing the trout kisses or bean-flicking our sex life is amazing. It’s like he really ‘gets’ me. And I love it. I let him pound my ass with the same ferocity that he pounds my cunt, and as much as it hurts and I almost want to scream out our safe word, hearing and seeing him get that hot for me – violently hot for me – turns me on immensely. I find it such a fucking turn on, almost as if I’m pushing him to a point where he can no longer control the depth of his thrusts … or he doesn’t want to.
He uses me like a toy, and I can’t get enough of it. In all the men (and women) I’ve slept with, I think only a handful of them have really delivered exactly the kind of thing I’m looking for, sexually – and here’s Guy, swinging his literal sword, offering it up on a plate, fucking me across every surface of the house.
I wish we could find some sort of friends-with-benefits place to hang around in, but with him dropping the L-word every five minutes it doesn’t feel like the smartest idea in the world.
Do you think it’s even possible to find just one person that you click with sexually, that also ticks every other box? Or is there always going to be something missing/I don’t like about them?
Am I always going to have to compromise on something?
I’ll definitely break up with him tomorrow.
Definitely.
Maybe over the phone this time.
Thanks so much for reading my blog today! 🖤
You can read the entire Guy chapter from start to finish right here.
Fancy something filthy instead? How about one of these:
