I Wasn't Ready Sex Fails 

That Time I Wasn’t Ready

Today, I’d like to talk about that time I wasn’t ready… also known as my first ever blowjob. It was every bit the failure that first-time sexual experiences tend to be, and it was bred from hours of laughing, kissing, and heavy petting in that way you do with your first ever partner. He’d drawn the curtains and closed the door, just as we always did when we went to his house. There was some film playing in the background. I can’t remember which. We’d been kissing for hours –…

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Someone New Sex Fails 

What To Do When You Accidentally Break His Penis

There’s nothing more annoying than spending three hours primping and preening yourself, getting ready for a good night of action after a few weeks away, only to get there and break your boyfriend’s penis. Oh yeah, I broke his penis. Friday afternoon, I went for a bikini wax.Someone New wanted me baby smooth so he would get me baby smooth. Friday evening, I realised the waxer hadn’t exactly done the greatest of jobs. Saturday morning, I call up waxer to bitch and moan. Saturday afternoon, I headed back down to…

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