Bear 

Misinterpretation

It’s funny, the little things that get misinterpreted in a relationship. A hastily scribbled note, for example, or a text message from someone who wants to send you samples of stuff to try and review. Both of these things have wreaked havoc in my relationship over the last few days and I feel it’s about time I talked about it. We lost the Apple TV remote. That’s how it all started. In fact, that’s not how it all started. It all started when some guy got in touch to send…

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Bear True Tales 

Sunday Funday

We’d unexpectedly found ourselves alone, left twiddling our thumbs, staring at each other from opposite ends of a dining room table. There was something about him today. I couldn’t quite put my finger on what it was, but it was certainly distracting. I was distracted. Maybe there was something about me? Either way, I couldn’t help but think that he looked like the hottest thing I’d ever seen. Hot as fuck. Hotter than that, in fact. Do you ever have those days when you just look at your significant other…

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Bear 

How Long Is The Honeymoon Stage Meant to Last Anyway?

There comes a point in every new relationship, I think, where romance fades away into real life. I think we have reached that point, Bear and I. Why do I say that? Shall I make a list? We haven’t had sex in like, 4 days. We’re arguing a lot. Petty arguing. Nothing relationship-shattering, though, don’t worry. I found a steaming turd in the toilet this morning. I pick up socks and dirty pants on a daily basis. He naps all the time. I can’t remember the last time I put…

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Bear 

Ugly Green Monster

It’s been a while since I’ve been an overly jealous person. I know I have very jealous (translation: crazy) tendencies in me somewhere because they all came out while I was married. I think they also came out quite a lot when I dated Jock. His ex was a constant problem and I was always jealous of her power to keep him dangling. I don’t think I saw it as jealousy at the time, but after reading some of those posts again recently, I can very clearly see the big…

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Bear 

He Doesn’t Own a Single Saucepan

You know when you move in with someone and you find out all this weird stuff about them … Well, yeah, that. Let’s talk about that right now. Why? Because I vomited this morning and it seems like a really great place to start. Let’s go back to the beginning. “Babe, the kettle’s broke.” “Please tell me you’re kidding. Oh my god, I’m going to die. This is it, this is how it ends for me. Lack of morning tea. Bye Bear, I love you.” “Don’t be so dramatic, I…

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Bear 

I’m at Home Right Now …

I’m at home right now. I’m at home surrounded by my own mess, desperately trying to pack and getting nowhere. My cat just keeps jumping in and out of the boxes and suitcases I’m trying to neatly arrange things in, and I just can’t seem to keep my mind on one thing and one thing only for very long. I don’t know where this wave of anxiety has come from. Before I put my key in my door, I had no reservations about moving in with Bear at all. Now…

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Bear 

Bring. It. On.

Moving in with someone, that’s a fucking massive step, isn’t it? But it’s a step I appear to be taking with Bear. It’s a step we’ve been talking about for a while, too long probably, and too early on in our relationship. But, six months in, we’ve finally made that decision: we’re moving in together. It makes total sense, really. I seem to be spending more and more time at Bear’s house. One rent payment each month would definitely be nicer than two. And the rest of the bills for…

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Bear 

The Three-Week Accidental Holiday

Here’s a few things I learned when I accidentally spent three weeks at Bear’s house: He leaves dirty laundry everywhere. It doesn’t piss me off. It makes me laugh every time I pick it up. Every sock. Every pair of pants. Every t-shirt. I’m pretty sure that is the very definition of loving someone, of accepting someone, warts and all, their every little foible and quirk. He’s horny. All. The. Time. I’m a horny little thing sometimes, and especially in the first flourishes of a new relationship, but he’s something…

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The Accidental Brown Eyes-Shaped Hole Bear Brown Eyes 

Case of the Ex, Pt. 2: The Accidental Brown Eyes-Shaped Hole

Well, where was I? I literally have about 20 almost-finished blog posts here, all stacked up. Stuff I’ve written on my phone, or on my iPad, or on my Mac. I need to actually put them together into a blog post at some point, and I’m starting that right now. I’m sorry I’ve been so absent. In my defence, there was a death and then a funeral, I basically moved in with Bear and then I went back home again, I had to hang out with my family … Y’know.…

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Case of the Ex Bear Brown Eyes 

Case of the Ex

I have all these blog posts I really want to post, but instead I’m wasting my time with that fucking moron again. Once again, despite our last email exchange, Brown Eyes still hasn’t got the picture, and right now he’s more than pissing me off. Now he’s actively wrecking my relationship. It was 9am, I’d woken up desperately needing to pee and it was freezing cold outside the duvet. When I got to the bathroom, my 5-day-late period had arrived, which I was seriously thankful for but it pissed me…

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