It Happened.
I don’t know what to say. Jock messaged me. 1:20am – two words – “you ok?”
My heart hurts and my brain is fried.
I’ll over-analyse this to death tomorrow. After my endoscopy. Which is in 6 hours.
Why? Fuck. Why?
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One Thought to “It Happened. ”
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The answer to why is probably along the lines of ‘he wants to know he still has you on his string for an ego stroke when he needs it’, or ‘he fancies a shag’ or ‘he’s drunk and sent the text to all his exes to see who’ll bite’ or ‘his ex/new gf isn’t playing ball and he needs to triangulate her with someone and you will do nicely’ or ‘he just wants to mess with your head.’ Who cares why? But I tell you what it DIDN’T mean – it didn’t mean he’s ‘come to his senses’ and realised what he’s lost (although this is possibly what he might say in order to get whatever he wants from you). Do you REALLY want a lifetime of the way he treated you? Yes? See a psychotherapist and work on your deep-seated personal issues. No? Send the damn message to the bin where it belongs and get on with your life. Don’t rent out space in your head to fuckwit time-wasters. If you do, don’t be surprised when they burn the place down.