UK Dating & Sex Blog | 12 Years of Graphic Detail | 18+
I’m think I’m doing that thing again. You know – where I click with a guy almost instantly and get carried away. We were chit-chatting and he was just another guy on Tinder I was talking to who’d likely disappear after a week or so, and the next minute he had my phone number, we were arranging our first date, and a week of chit-chatting had passed. And then I blew him out. He was sending me ‘good morning’ messages and I was telling him to be safe. He got…
Read MoreI left-swipe a lot. I can’t work out if I’m too picky, or if I’m one of those bitchy girls who’s bothered about the ‘superficial’ stuff like having all your own teeth, or not being so big you probably couldn’t leave the house. Oh, or not being so thin it looks like I could snap you like a twig. Hey, I might be a size-ist superficial bitch but I’m not in the least bit bothered about how much he earns or what he does for a living. *I admitted I…
Read MoreI should really tell you the story about what happened between Courier Guy and I. For those who don’t follow me on Twitter, I received the “I’m sorry, but it’s not going to work,” text that I knew one of us would need to send eventually. To be honest, I’m glad he did it for me. It’s not that he wasn’t a nice guy, he just wasn’t the right guy for me. There wasn’t an immediate spark – I didn’t find myself running to my phone hoping he’d text me,…
Read MoreOf all the ridiculous reasons I’ve ever been given for a crush / dating / relationship deal-breaker, flatulence has got to be one of them. He didn’t even use the word flatulence either — he said farting. He actually said: “My deal-breaker is farting. I can’t stand it. If a girl ever did that in front of me, I’d be disgusted.” Wow. This has bugged me for a while and I wasn’t going to write about it because I thought perhaps I’d overreacted. He was a little cutie, a guy…
Read MoreIt’s taken me a few days to write this blog post which I’m assuming isn’t a great thing. I can’t usually wait to write up exciting events such as first dates but this time, I didn’t want to shout about it. I don’t really know why. It wasn’t a bad date. In fact, it was a pretty good date. I just don’t know how I feel about it. Or about him. Courier Guy was every bit as tall as he said he was, his 6-foot-something towering over my little 5-foot-3…
Read MoreI read somewhere that you learn something from every person who comes into your life and then leaves. I guess that’s what life is all about really, a learning curve. Making mistakes, trying to learn from them, moving on and becoming older, wiser, smarter. I’ve been thinking about the decisions I’ve made in my life and whether or not I’ve learned from them. Whether I’ve learned anything at all from the men I’ve dated, loved, and split from. Ten days later, ten days without ANY communication from Brown Eyes, I…
Read MoreThe back-story: Day Seven. (Just in case you haven’t already read it.) He’s not looking for me. He’s not in love with me. He’s in love with the idea of me, of someone who’ll do as she’s told, suck his dick, and look cute in public. I thought he was a little Dom-ish for a while. I think maybe he’s just a 42 year old man-brat. He doesn’t want to dominate, he wants control, total control, using whatever means necessary. Either way, I’m not the plaything he’s looking for. He…
Read MoreOn day seven, I woke up and knew something was wrong right away. I had no morning text message from Brown Eyes. He’s always up and awake long before me in the morning so it was unusual for me to wake up and not be greeted by a text. It’s usually the sign of a bad day for him, I’ve learned to recognise that now. He’d been a little funny with me the night before, seemingly short with no X’s and O’s at the end of his messages. That was…
Read MoreI need to tell you a secret. In fact, I need to tell you a whole bunch of secrets. I’ve been lying. Well … Not really lying. More omitting the truth. Either way, I need to tell you some stuff. He kept telling me he was sorry, endless voicemails and emails because he was blocked everywhere else. There was a rose, a beautiful, colourful one because I was a beautiful, colorful girl. And there was the note that came with it, that beautiful note that told me he was going…
Read MoreBacon Sandwiches & Blowjobs continued… I’ve never given a blowjob with an actual ice cube in my mouth before. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve sucked on an ice cube and let it melt (or popped it out my mouth) to go down on a guy before, but I’ve never had an ice cube and a dick in my mouth at the same time. That all changed the other day when Brown Eyes playfully shoved one in my mouth and ordered me to suck his dick. Not that I needed much…
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