99 WhatsApp Messages Later

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99 WhatsApp Messages Later

Oh my god! I like Someone New and sometimes, I really think I could be falling in love with that man, but every now and again, he does something so ridiculous, I can’t believe he’s calling himself an adult. Last night was a prime example.

I’ve blown him out a lot recently, not because I don’t want to see him, but because shit keeps getting in the way. You’d think that we’d be able to pull ourselves together to at least manage to see each other once a week but apparently, I can’t even manage that.

He’s made another plan for Tuesday night, because he’s going away a couple of days later for two weeks, and if he doesn’t see me, he’s going to come and kidnap me. I get annoyed with his constant persistence sometimes, although I know it’s just because he misses me. He can get really whiny if he doesn’t get to see me, and although I appreciate he’s disappointed, I wish he’d see things from my point of view. The last time for example, I was really sick. We all know I have ongoing medical issues, and I’ve made no attempt to hide any of that from him. Yet when I spent the entire day running to the bathroom every five minutes, feeling like shit, food being ejected from my body out of all orifices, he didn’t ask how I was. Instead, he protested, disappointed I had let him down again.

Is it really so wrong that I don’t want my boyfriend to see me like that – no makeup on, hair scraped back, spending the entire day in my PJ’s, smelling like I haven’t showered for a week? I know there will probably be at least one day in our future that will result in him seeing me look like a skank, but is it really so much to ask that it’s not right now – six months in, still unsure of what is wrong with me in the first place, or how I feel about him? I’m still getting my head around my illness, almost a year later. I don’t know how to deal with it properly. How can I expect him to try?

Anyway… I was cooking dinner. For roughly half an hour I was away from my phone and when I returned, I had 99 WhatsApp notifications.

What. The. Fuck?

One of those notifications was from a friend. The other 98 were from him – Someone New. You could not make this shit up.

He was just playing around, trying to get my attention. It was a joke. He said that last time…

Yes that’s right, this is not the first incident of my lovely boyfriend (sarcasm) sending me message after message because he couldn’t get my attention. He is a little attention whore. Sometimes I find it endearing but at others, like last night, I just found it really annoying. Who sends 98 WhatsApp messages in a row before they finally get the hint – the other person IS NOT available?

Guys, here’s a piece of advice for you:


If she doesn’t answer the first message, or the tenth message, she’s probably not available. Sending her message after message makes you look sad, pathetic, desperate, and needy. Yes, we know you are trying to get our attention. No, that is not the right way to do it. It’s annoying. That beep, that constant vibration – ANNOYING! Plus trying to open any other application on your phone is impossible when it feels the need to tell you about every single fucking message you just received. Honestly guys, think it through. For fucks sake.

(Girls, you should probably take note too!)

But seriously though – 99 WhatsApp messages later…

Who fucking does that?!

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